HeistYellow Mama 2015
I’ve had enough. How much can a person take? I’ll tell you how much, Use me for example, I can take a full side of beef, a case of King Crabs, two large bags of rolls still warm from the baker’s oven and the daily newspaper lying in front of the store.
I can and did take that except I forgot the newspaper I was so busy wrangling the side of beef into the trunk with my golf clubs and beach crap that I left it where it was thrown. It was when I left the trunk open and stooped to pick up the paper that the cop came around the corner and since he does this as part of his rounds five days a week I was out of place and out of bounds. I would’ve been gone and safe if I didn’t go back for the paper. Now I know why they say no one reads the paper anymore.
I’m out of options. I have one phone call and I don’t want to waste it on my wife who’ll just throw my ineptitude up to me and it’s too early to call a lawyer so I think I’ll save it for when I really need it.
“Guard,” I call.
“What is it?”
“Can I have today’s paper to read?”