Lint

Pure Slush Australia 2013 Earl of Plaid 2014

"What do you collect?" He opened the conversation with.

"I don't collect anything," she told him.

"Not possible," he said, "everyone collects something."

"You mean like coins or stamps?"

"There are other things to collect—less common things. I have a friend who collects belly-button lint and each night he puts it in a baggie and labels it with the date and location," he said.

"Location, isn't that redundant?" She asked.

"Why redundant?" He asked.

"Well if he collects navel lint the location is always the same—from his navel. Right?"

"Well, the lint is, but sometimes he may be in different places like New York or Quitoor a birthday party or even a bar and that's the location he writes down," he explained trying not to show his true feelings.

"Why didn't you just say that? Maybe I'll start collecting confusing and ambiguous things that guys say in these speed dating sessions."

"Okay, there you go with your first collection."

"What about you?" She asked. "What do you collect?"

"I have many collections—too many to name."

"Just name one—that's all I'm asking for since you brought the subject up and we only have twenty seconds left."

"I collect inane conversations that I have in bars," he told her.

"That's a good one but it sounds like it would be difficult."

"Nice meeting you."

"You too," she said.

And just as she was getting up he pushed the off button on his micro-recorder and pulled a baggie from his pocket. Walking to the next table he slid his hand up his shirt front.

 

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